Intuitive Eating: Make Peace with Food

Making peace with food comes from the intuitive eating framework. This specific principle is about giving oneself unconditional permission to eat whatever food sounds good at any given moment. This principle tends to bring up feelings of nervousness and anxiety for many folks. You might be experiencing intrusive thoughts such as, “I will gain so much weight”, “I will never want to stop eating”, or “I will eat all the food in my pantry”. Those concerns make a lot of sense and are very normal. 

Why don't we begin with breaking this concept down a bit by learning about how our biology fits in? 

When you tell yourself you can’t or shouldn’t have a particular food, it can lead to intense feelings of deprivation. Even if your behaviors do not reflect the restriction of any kind, if your mind is using blaming, judgmental, or restrictive language, this puts our nervous system in a scarcity mindset. When our bodies perceive deprivation, the primitive nature of our biology kicks in. Our bodies increase cravings and kick-up hunger cues. When you finally “give in” to your forbidden foods, eating will be experienced with such intensity it usually results in “last supper overeating” which feels like out-of-control eating or binging episodes. The out-of-control eating then leads to overwhelming guilt, which then leads to restriction, and you’ve got it! The cycle starts over…

Some practical steps to think through if you feel caught in this cycle:

• First: give yourself permission to believe that all foods are equivalent. You aren’t healthy or unhealthy for eating one food over another.  

• Second: no penance, be mindful to not get reactive.

• Third: work on not allowing yourself to deprive yourself.

You would be right to think that, at first, your body and mind will be so excited with this unconditional permission, that you may eat more than what feels comfortable. That’s okay! What eventually happens, is what we call the habituation process. 

When no food is forbidden and your body and mind build trust that you will give yourself whatever food you want and however much you want, the deprivation mindset will diminish. At this point habitation will set in. Habituation means, that the more you are exposed to food over time, the less of a big deal it is. If you haven’t given into habituation, then food stays exciting, and your brain believes that you will never allow yourself to eat this tasty treat ever again. Therefore, when you eat it, it’s likely, that you eat to discomfort due to the fear that you will never get it again. Aren’t our bodies incredibly intelligent?!

Begin with just one “forbidden food”. When we start one at a time, it tends to feel less anxiety-inducing and less overwhelming. Keep in mind, when you give yourself unconditional permission, that does not just mean physical. Emotionally and mentally, it is important to engage in self-talk to really give yourself full permission. When we allow guilt to creep in, it disrupts the process. Guilt isn’t unconditional permission. Guilt ultimately makes you stop eating something. 

It is also very important to address that intuitive eating is a privileged approach. Making peace with food is only available to those who have access to the foods they want and that there is enough of it to feel satisfied. There is difficulty in honoring fullness when you don’t know where your next meal is coming from. If you are struggling with food insecurity, your first and only goal begins with access and improved resources to provide with you the nutrition your body needs to survive.  

Here are a few local food pantries for individuals seeking assistance: 

• Harvesters Community Food Network

• Seton Center

• Salvation Army-KCK Emergency Assistance 

• Roswell Food Pantry

• Greater Metropolitan Food Pantry/Homeless Ministry

• Memorial church International Food Pantry

• Community West Food Pantry

• Blue Hills Family Life Center

• Community Assistance Council

This process is about trust. Trusting the process and trusting your body. This can be so challenging at first. Take it one step at a time. 

Below you will find a guided eating practice to help with the process. 

*Caveats:

• If you feel vulnerable to your emotions right now, this practice is not appropriate. 

• This practice may not be appropriate for individuals who do not have access to their hunger cues due to medical reasons or due to having a history of restriction. 

This practice is created by the founders of intuitive eating, Evelyn Tribole, and Elyse Resch.

When practicing this exercise, it is important that you aren’t terribly hungry to begin, rather that you are neutral. Begin first by thinking of one food that you typically consider to be a “forbidden food”. When ready and if you have access, get multiple servings of this food.

Find a place where you won't be disturbed. Relax and take a deep breath. Start by thinking about this food. What about this food feels forbidden? Did someone say something to you about this food? Was there an event that happened around this food to make it feel forbidden? Perhaps you feel it's plain bad for you? Just notice what thoughts as they come up for you. No judgment, just notice. Before you eat the food, give yourself permission to eat it and enjoy it. Feel yourself surrendering to resistance. Give yourself unconditional permission. If you'd like, take a couple of deep breaths. Now open your eyes slowly, now with intention, take a bite of the food. Take note of taste, texture, and temperature. Let your senses explore this food. How does it feel as it goes down your throat? Now bring your awareness to your feelings. What feelings are coming up for you? Excitement, fear? Fear is normal when you are doing something new. Just notice and remind yourself that you have permission. Now take another bite. Again, notice sensations, thoughts, and feelings that come up when you eat this food without restriction. Allow all your resistance to melt away as you eat without restriction and instead of freedom. Does the food taste different because you are eating with permission? Now stop eating and notice how you feel. What sensations are coming in your body? Take notice. Do you feel comfortably full? Now take a few breaths and open your eyes. 

If you are interested in learning more about intuitive eating, call to book a session. 

Annie Bretches, LPC, LCPC