After a vast review of research and literature by relationship experts, psychotherapist Jessica Fern, author of Polysecure, indicates 5 ways you can cultivate a secure attachment with your partner.

Ever wonder why we can have such strong, opposing views and needs from those closest to us? Have you experienced recurring conflicts with partners, parents, or friends that leave you feeling misunderstood?

Many parents are struggling to adapt to the new norm of raising children during a pandemic. Between a decrease in childcare options, kids attending school virtually from home, and concerns of keeping families healthy, parents are finding it difficult to navigate the chaos.  

If you are like many other individuals experiencing life in this pandemic, you are likely feeling elevated levels of stress. In a recent survey done by the CDC comparing reports of adverse mental health outcomes in 2019, respondents reported experiencing 4 times as much depression, 3 times are much anxiety and 2 times as much suicidal thoughts in 2020. This is clearly a difficult time to be a human. 

It’s no secret that long-lasting love takes work and determination. Often at the beginning of a relationship, we are smitten with our partners. We might think “no disagreement will ever drive us apart” “or “our love is stronger than any conflict we might face”. Yet, after time passes, an argument here, a disagreement there, we might experience a drifting away from each other – yearning for the closeness we felt at the beginning of our love story.  

One of the most surprising findings relationship researcher John Gottman found, was that long-lasting intimacy and trust was not based on the depth and breadth of conversations couples had. Instead it was the couple’s willingness to respond to each other’s bids for connection. It didn’t matter the topic or context, it was the availability and intentionality to respond to a partner’s bid, no matter how trivial, that kept the spark and closeness.